One of the attitudes that makes it hard to seek help

Today, I was reading through my Twitter feed (I do that every once in a while) and came across a link from Katherine Stone of PostPartum Progress. She had tweeted a link to an article (from Psychology Today) titled "Why Are Healthcare Providers Not Listening?" The article talked about the fact that PostPartum women are reaching out for help for PPMD symptoms and getting a whole lot of silence. It was a wonderful article that I highly encourage everyone to go read. I liked it so much that I shared it on my Facebook news feed. One person in particular, responding to a comment about a soldier who had been taken to the ER after a suicide attempt and turned away because the beds were needed for "something more serious", had this to say:

"As serious as suicide may be, I would think potential nonvoluntary deaths should take priority in any sort of triage situation."

Now. This is someone I know in person. He's a great guy. I'm trying very hard to not make him in particular my focus on a personal level. My focus here is on this: this type of attitude is, in my opinion, one of the prime contributors to people with mental health issues having difficulty seeking help. This is not just something that this one person is saying. This is an attitude that MANY people in our society have and have no problem expressing

The underlying message, whether consciously intended or not, is that "Attempted suicide/mental illness is not as important as *insert other 'nonvoluntary potential death' causing issue/illness/condition/event here*."Ifound it ironic that a response to the article that was talking about women who are seeking treatment for PPMD and NOT getting it illustrated so clearly that treating and helping people with mental health issues, and/or people who have/are thinking about attempting suicide, is not as high a priority as treating someone who was shot, stabbed, in a car wreck, has a terminal illness, or any other "nonvoluntary potential death" or problem.

In a sense, this person is right. Helping someone who has attempted suicide is NOT as high a priority as helping someone who was in a car wreck. However, it certainly should be. Knowing that it's not, and hearing people say things like this, seeing this very attitude displayed, is part of what made it so hard for me to reach out and seek help when I was struggling with PostPartum Depression. It's part of what made it hard for people I know and love with PTSD to seek help. When the message you get is "Your problem is not as important" or "Attempted suicide should be a lower priority in triage", why on earth would you make yourself vulnerable and admit something that's already hard to admit, why would you reach out for help, if you think that help is going to be denied and that your feelings of inferiority are just going to be confirmed by others?


Now. I know this person and I know other people who have made statements like this. They are not people who go around looking for ways to belittle and push others down. Statements and attitudes like this are often the result of ignorance. That ignorance can only be changed through advocacy, public discourse, and education. That's why my blog, and others like it, exist. However, the attitudes and statements, the ignorance, don't just need to be addressed on the level of talking to my friends on Facebook and Twitter. It has to be addressed and changed in healthcare professionals, hospitals, clinics, etc. Hospitals shouldn't be turning people away if they don't have a bed to admit them after a suicide attempt. Instead of "Well, we just don't have room for you, later dude", the response should be "We're going to keep you in the ER until we find a hospital that DOES have room for you, at which point you will be transferred via ambulance." or something along those lines.

Make no mistake though, whether we're talking about doctors, nurses, or the people on my Facebook and Twitter feeds, this attitude HAS, and I do mean HAS, to be changed. As long as this attitude is out there and people feel comfortable not only making statements like this but then defending them, it will be that much harder for people to reach out and say "I need help". I speak as someone who has been there, done that. Change is needed and it all starts with awareness.

My thoughts on "The REAL PostPartum Depression Treatment".

Lately, I've been suffering a lack of inspiration. Maybe I should call it writer's block. I have ideas and topics out the wazoo but I can never manage to write anything remotely readable about any of them. However, I think that I've finally got something I can write about. 


I was browsing the internet for PPD blogs, looking for some more to add to my blogroll, and came across a link for Jackie Hall's "Our REAL PostPartum Depression Treatment". The title caught my attention so I clicked the link. What I read had my eyebrows hitting the roof. Due to the sheer length of the text, I'm not going to copy and paste the entire thing to this blog entry but I have (for posterity's sake) put the entire text here. However, I'd like to include some of my... er... favorite... excerpts here.

Believe me, as someone who has struggled with postpartum depression… I can help you UNDERSTAND exactly what it takes to get you back to your happy, care-free self.

Oh how nice. Without being a trained medical professional with access to your medical history, much less access to any labwork, she can diagnose you AND tell you how to fix it! 

In fact, I was able to come up with 5 simple but powerful steps that will help ANY new mum get through her battle with after-pregnancy sadness and depression.

Wow, I didn't realize that everyone reacted the same to any particular treatment plan. My doctors and therapists must have been clueless since they said quite the opposite. 

More importantly, you can learn how to get that happy life back in just a few minutes from now.

Uh... 

How much better do you think it will be for you when you know EXACTLY what you need to do to get back to living the happy life you KNOW you were meant to live?

And how much better will you feel knowing you’re being the best Mum you possibly can be for your children?

Now, maybe it's just me, but this reads an awful lot like a guilt trip, like if you don't take her up on her miraculous offer, you'll be being the opposite of "the best mum you can possibly be for your children". Great. Just what moms with PPD (or any other PPMD) need to hear: that they're being the worst mum they can. 

My 12 week step by step Postpartum Depression Recovery Program will help you overcome the feelings of overwhelm and stress that can make motherhood seem almost unbearable at times.

Anyone who claims that their program WILL help you overcome PostPartum Depression is full of baloney. Any competent medical professional will tell you that there's no guarantee that any particular treatment (medical or otherwise) absolutely WILL work. Any time you're dealing with a medical problem, to include mental health, it's very much a trial and error process. Nobody can be guaranteed that they will respond a particular way to a particular treatment. Shoot, even treating something as simple as an ear infection gets a statement of "This antibiotic usually has success but bring your daughter back in about a week so we can make sure the ear infection is clearing up". 

Bottom line is… if you learn the right mindset and approach to these challenges, you can change your defeated, negative, sad and depressed feedlings and begin feeling more happiness and enjoyment for life. All feelings are a result of your thinking. This program arms you with the ability to change this thinking (even in the heat of the moment) and handle ANY situation that arises in your life.

Actually, the bottom line is that if you are suffering PostPartum Depression, you need to seek immediate medical attention from trained medical professionals. Also, some feelings are not the result of your thinking but the result of hormonal imbalances. 

What’s more is that you don’t need to keep rolling around in the events of your past to get better. This only reinforces the thinking that underlies your depression. This program will teach you once and for all how to change this thinking and STOP feeling so bad about yourself and your life.

 I feel like a broken record, but hormonal imbalances are quite often what TRULY underlies PPD. My PPD wasn't caused by "bad thinking" or "rolling around in the events of my past". I won't say they are always the underlying problem because unlike some people, I don't claim to know what causes PPD for everyone or how to fix it for everyone. All I know is what helped me, and I don't even know that that would be the correct course of treatment for me if I dealt with it again.

All that’s happening is that you have negative, self-defeating thoughts that are poisoning your mind. These need to be corrected and I can teach you how to do this.

So what about those of us for whom "all that's happening" is that our thyroid is malfunctioning, or we have some other type of hormonal imbalance, or any of the other medical problems that so often are the culprit behind a PPMD? Correcting those :negative, self-defeating thoughts" that are "poisoning our minds" isn't going to cause hormone levels to get back to where they need to be. 

With The Postpartum Depression Recovery Program, not only will you stop your postpartum depression, but you’ll also learn how to put a stop to the cycle of handing down the same depression-causing beliefs to your children.

Again, sounding like a broken record, but guaranteeing that this little "How to change your thoughts" program WILL stop your PPD is both dangerous AND irresponsible. "Depression-causing beliefs" can not always be assumed to be THE reason someone is struggling from a PPMD.

I’ll show you how to eliminate the negative energy that’s causing you to feel this way.

Ok, so what about eliminating the medical problems that are causing me to feel this way? 

You’re going to become a much better Mum, parent, and role-model because of it.

Again with the implied guilt trip, that if you don't buy her program you will not be a "much better Mum, parent, and role-model". 

I’m going to lay out the exact steps you need to follow… so you no longer have to wonder if you’re doing all the right things.

That must be why I occasionally still wonder "Am I doing it (it being parenting) right? Am I messing up?". And here I always thought that was just a normal part of parenting since nobody (except, apparently, Jackie Hall) is born or automatically imbued at childbirth with all the answers to every single situation that will come up in child-raising. Does this make it my mom's fault, for not buying this program and thus handing down all this negative energy to me, or my fault for not buying the program for myself? Maybe it's BOTH our faults!

Better yet, you can learn ALL of it in just a few minutes… so you can start feeling more like yourself a lot sooner.

So if I can learn it all in just a few minutes, why is it a 12-week program?

Here’s what you’ll notice after using the Postpartum Depression Recovery Program:

• RELIEF as you discover that what’s happening to you can be changed quickly and easily.

 You know, as long as your PPD isn't caused by a medical problem that needs medical treatment from a medical professional.

• An UNDERSTANDING of why you got PPD in the first place (in fact it will make perfect sense to you after completing the first week’s lesson!)

I can probably give an even more educated guess than she is, I'll do it right now, and I won't even charge you anything: you probably got PPD because you had a baby and your body hasn't quite regulated itself properly yet! 

Well, let me ask… what price can you put on feeling better about yourself?

What’s your happiness worth?

Let's see: at 19.95/week for 12 weeks, apparently it's worth  239.40, assuming there's no tax added on.

You’d spend thousands of dollars going to see a doctor.

Actually, that depends very much on minor details like insurance, the type of treatment, etc. Thanks to my insurance (which I am very lucky to have), the only thing I paid was co-pays on medication. 

In fact, if you do feel you’re suicidal or in a deep, deep depression, I suggest you get medical help right away.

I included this because at least she's adding in that caveat. Last time I blogged about a program like this was when I read about Sheryl Paul and her program, and there was no such caveat at the time (I have no idea if she's changed it since). However, I do not feel that adding in "If you feel suicidal you should seek medical help right away" in any way excuses the rest of what she's saying... but at least she's saying it about suicidal feelings.

And since I can offer this system to you as an online, downloadable system… there are no printing or shipping costs. That way, I can pass along the savings to you.

If you join today, the Postpartum Recovery Program is now only $79.00 $19.95 a week!

I'm going to take a wild guess that her page always says that as an added method of trying to get people to buy instantly, feeling that they don't want to miss this INCREDIBLE opportunity. 

I can honestly say that there’s NEVER been a resource for mums that gives you the support, guidance, and knowledge you need for such an unbelievably affordable price.

Actually, there are other programs that are hyped up as exactly the same thing that are more affordable... Additionally, there are resources that give support, guidance, and knowledge for free, they just don't claim to promise to heal you.

I just know this 12 week program is going to help ease your pains and frustrations… and solve your problems that you’re facing as a new mum who has suddenly found herself overwhelmed.

Oh, so this program is going to come to my house and help me do laundry, grocery shopping, take care of the baby so I can get a nap or get more than 3 hours of sleep at one fell swoop, make my beat-up lady bits feel better, make me feel attractive, magically cause my extra poundage to drop off, and take the kid for a while so my husband and I can go on a date? AWESOME! Now THAT is something I would pay 19.95/week for.

You know… I’m very confident this postpartum depression recovery program will give you everything you need so you can start feeling happy and like yourself again.

I’ve already tested and proven it with my own success. And it has also worked for each and every Mum who has seriously followed along in the program.

Ah, so the women for whom it DIDN'T work must have just not been following along seriously enough. Roger. It's really their fault.


Believe it or not, I actually left out a lot of what she wrote. These are just the lowlights highlights. There are so many problems with what she's written. There are so many dangers to programs like this and to hers specifically. The first one that comes to my mind is the fact that she's not saying "Regardless of how 'mild' a case you feel like you're dealing with, you should be seeking medical treatment and bringing my program up with them to see if it is a viable candidate for your treatment.'. She doesn't even begin to go into the fact that PPD is so much more complex than "negative energy" or "faulty thought processes", the fact that it is a legitimate MEDICAL problem that NEEDS to be treated by a medical professional who has some sort of degree or certification proving that they have been trained in how to treat issues like this. Even if that treatment consists of one visit with a doctor who says "You know, why don't we try out this program and see if it benefits you", after determining that there's not an underlying issue like hypothyroidism or other hormonal imbalances AND determining that your PPD is not, in fact, a lot worse than you realize it is, you need to see a medical professional first.


I'm also pretty upset with the "Blame the victim" mentality. And regardless of whether she realizes that's what she's doing, that's what she's doing. She is essentially telling everyone that "This is because of something YOU are doing or not doing. This is the result of the thoughts that YOU choose to think.". Like I said before, the LAST thing a mom with PPD needs is someone (else) telling her that her PPD is her fault.


I had planned to take this blog post to also cover an article I found that she wrote but I didn't realize this would be as long as it is, so I'll save that for another day. The thing I want most for everyone reading this to take away from this post is that the first thing you should do when you realize you're dealing with PPD (or start having concerns about how you're feeling after having a baby) is to call your doctor. Please please please, don't go online and buy some program instead. Any type of treatment, whether pills, therapy, or something online to change your outlook, should ONLY be started under the guidance, supervision, and approval of your medical professional. And any time you read about a program that guarantees a fix to your PPMD, you probably ought to just run the other way because anyone who claims to be able to diagnose and guarantee to treat you successfully like that... well... just no. There are no guarantees about treatment for anything, and anyone with even a SHRED of integrity who has developed a treatment will tell you that.


If you are suffering from PPD, it is not your fault. Please don't buy into the line of BS that it's because of bad energy or faulty thought processes or because you're "rolling around in events from your past". You are beautiful, wonderful, and loved. You are strong. There is hope out there and you can find help. Please do seek that help... from your trained medical professional.

The entire text of Jackie Hall's "Our REAL PostPartum Depression Treatment".

This is the entire text of Jackie Hall's 12-week PPD treatment program. The link at which I found this gem is http://www.postpartumdepressionrecovery.com/our-postpartum-depression-treatment/.

Our REAL Postpartum Depression Treatment

This page is for ANY Mum who feels completely alone…

or who feels like the WORST mum in the world.

“Mums: If You’re Feeling Sad, Hopeless,
Overwhelmed, and Alone… and Don’t Know
Where to Turn For Real Help… then what you read next will Be The
Most Important Letter You Ever Read.”

Here’s The True Story Of How I Went From Being So Depressed I NEVER
Wanted To Get Out Of Bed In The Morning… To Being Happier Than
I’ve Ever Been in My Entire Life…

As a former postpartum depression sufferer, I want to share my breakthrough recovery
secrets with you… so you can live the happy, joy-filled life you deserve!

Dear new Mum:
I have a few questions I’d like to ask you. Please, be open and honest with yourself as you answer them.
Are you happy right now? I mean, really happy? Are you at a point in your life where everything’s great?
Or… do you feel like there’s a dark cloud hanging over you?
Do you feel like you’re constantly battling negative thoughts… and they’re making you feel overwhelmed and depressed?
Do you often find yourself with feelings of hopelessness, despair, or sadness? Are you frustrated because it causes such a burden and pain in your everyday life?
Do you find yourself with low energy and it’s tough to get motivated to do what you need to do?
Do you usually find yourself worrying or full of anxiety about the small things in your life?
Do you get angry or even lash out, for no apparent reason, at your kids or other loved ones? Do you ever feel that you’re alone, even when you’re in a room full of other people?
Do you feel like your life would be better if you didn’t feel this way all the time?
If you’re a new Mum who feels alone and in a very dark place right now… then chances are you’re probably struggling with postpartum depression.
And believe it or not, this happens to women more than you think. It’s quite common and it doesn’t mean you’re crazy.
More importantly, I’m going to show you the way out of the dark place you’re in right now.
I want you to know that…

You are NOT Alone… and There IS Hope!

Believe me, as someone who has struggled with postpartum depression… I can help you UNDERSTAND exactly what it takes to get you back to your happy, care-free self.
In fact, I was able to come up with 5 simple but powerful steps that will help ANY new mum get through her battle with after-pregnancy sadness and depression.
More importantly, you can learn how to get that happy life back in just a few minutes from now.
How much better do you think it will be for you when you know EXACTLY what you need to do to get back to living the happy life you KNOW you were meant to live?
And how much better will you feel knowing you’re being the best Mum you possibly can be for your children?

My Own Personal Journey…

Hi. My name is Jackie Hall… mum, parenting coach and author of The Happy Mum Handbook.
I’ve been where you are right now. I’ve personally been on the roller coaster of loving motherhood one minute… and hating it the next.
So I know how you feel.
I know from personal experience how frustrating it can be to live in constant sadness and feelings of being all alone. And I also know what it’s like to live with the vicious cycle of anger, self-criticism, guilt, and overwhelm… feeling like the worst mother in the world because of it.
This can cause a lot of stress and frustration and can negatively affect your happiness and quality of life for both YOU and your family.
You see… six months after the birth of my second son, I found myself suffering from postpartum depression.
And it caused me to feel so sad and alone all the time.
As time went on, it only got worse because life seemed to become nothing more than a vicious circle.
I dreaded things like getting up at the crack of dawn, dealing with tantrums from my 16-month old, crying from my six-month old, and all the other new demands that were placed on me. I felt like I was isolated from all of the things that I had once enjoyed.
On a bad day, my anger would lead to sudden outbursts in front of my children, where I would yell and scream and throw things around, until I’d notice the horrified looks on their little faces.
I’d literally be brought to my knees in tears with guilt and self-hatred over my behavior. I couldn’t believe how bad of a mother I felt I had become.
But one day something happened that sent me on a mission to find help for my postpartum depression, and it changed my life forever.
During an angry outrage over one of my kids’ whining, I slammed a knife on the bench so hard… it bounced off and narrowly missed his head.
Completely shocked, I fell apart. I couldn’t handle it anymore. “I HATE MY LIFE” I screamed, as I ran crying to my room – all with my six month old still on my hip.
I honestly felt like…

I Was Trapped In A Dark Place I Couldn’t Get Myself Out Of…

I felt broken. I hated myself for what had happened. “Who does this?” I thought. “What sort of mother am I?”
And then, something strange happened. Right in the middle of that breakdown… right in the middle of those tears… I gained an amazing clarity and focus.
Two very distinct sentences entered my mind in that exact moment. It said:
“No one else can change this for you. No one else can change the way you feel about your life, only you can.”


I realized that if I didn’t do something for myself and learn how to make these changes… I’d be stuck feeling like this forever. And there was simply NO WAY I could deal with it.
So I went on a personal mission, and spent hours and hours reading every single book I could find on postpartum depression, regular depression, how to attain happiness, and more.
I was determined to do this for me AND my family. I owed it to them to be a better mum.

How I Finally Had My Breakthrough…

My big breakthrough came when I began reading books that were specifically written by Mums who had dealt with postpartum depression… who were now happier than they’ve ever been in their lives.
I literally became an information sponge… putting every single tip I learned into practice.
And the results were simply amazing because I started noticing dramatic improvements in my mood within the first few days.
I started feeling a lot better. Things didn’t seem to bother me as much.

I Finally Felt Happy…

From all the books I read, I learned 5 simple steps that gave me an overall feeling of peace of mind and calmness.
For the first time in a long time… I finally felt like myself again. I was content.
Because of those 5 steps I learned, these days my life is now filled with happiness and contentment, and NOT the sadness and irritability that my postpartum had been causing.
It’s like a giant weight has been lifted off from my shoulders.
And for a long time… my friends, family, and husband have been watching my transformation from angry, depressed mum… to a happy, caring, loving woman who has total peace of mind.
They’ve seen the success I’ve had, first-hand. And they all said “You have to write this stuff down and share it with other people. You could help out a LOT of other women who are dealing with postpartum depression!”
So that’s what I did.
I was able to develop an easy five-step process that I used (and still use today) to stop those relentless feelings of failure that come with postpartum depression.

And Now I Want To Help You Get Your Life Back…

I want you to know that there is something that you can do about your stress and your depression.
I’m living proof of that. I know what it feels like to be stressed and emotionally drained from postpartum.
I don’t want you to have to deal with that.
Ever since my discovery, I’ve helped thousands of women get back to living their lives.
And now, I’d love to share my 5 step process so you can change your current situation and stop your postpartum depression.

Introducing My 12 Week Postpartum Depression Recovery Program

My 12 week step by step Postpartum Depression Recovery Program will help you overcome the feelings of overwhelm and stress that can make motherhood seem almost unbearable at times.
You see, during my process of trying to get myself out of my postpartum depression, I came up with an easy-to-use five step technique called: The Mind TRACK to Happiness Process.
My system uses the word TRACK as an acronym for the five steps. They are:
T- Thoughts, R- Reality, A- Aim, C- Choices, K- Know your plan and take action!

Here Is What My System is All About

Think of this process as if you were climbing a ladder. At the bottom of the ladder are your sad, stressful, worthless thoughts and perceptions that are causing your postpartum depression. Your thoughts have become a habitual monologue that often runs unnoticed in the background of your mind. The first step is to acknowledge and identify these thoughts.
As you take the next step up the ladder to happiness… you start to change your thoughts. All stress is a conflict between belief (what I’m thinking) and reality (what is actually happening and an accurate perception of what is happening). These two steps are the most crucial steps that will STOP you feeling so sad and depressed! This program gives you a very specific and easy-to-remember model for upgrading the negative thinking to be in alignment with reality and change your perspective on the challenges you face.
Once you are aligned with reality, the rest of the steps turn your attention towards solutions: How to get what you want and do something about life when it’s not the way you want it to be.
By using this process… what you’re doing is shifting your attention away from those unproductive thoughts that are causing you to feel depressed, sad, and overwhelmed… and instead you’re changing your thoughts and habits so they support your HAPPINESS.
Bottom line is… if you learn the right mindset and approach to these challenges, you can change your defeated, negative, sad and depressed feedlings and begin feeling more happiness and enjoyment for life. All feelings are a result of your thinking. This program arms you with the ability to change this thinking (even in the heat of the moment) and handle ANY situation that arises in your life.
What’s more is that you don’t need to keep rolling around in the events of your past to get better. This only reinforces the thinking that underlies your depression. This program will teach you once and for all how to change this thinking and STOP feeling so bad about yourself and your life.

You Can Learn What I’ve Already Gone Through

 

Look, there’s nothing ‘wrong’ with you.
All that’s happening is that you have negative, self-defeating thoughts that are poisoning your mind. These need to be corrected and I can teach you how to do this.
It’s like we’re going to take that cassette tape of negative thoughts out of your tape player (your brain) and we’re going to smash it into little pieces!
With The Postpartum Depression Recovery Program, not only will you stop your postpartum depression, but you’ll also learn how to put a stop to the cycle of handing down the same depression-causing beliefs to your children.
Remember, YOU are the only one that can change the way you feel about your life and you can do this by joining this program and investing in new information that will change your life.

Does This Program ACTUALLY Work?

Many women ask me… “Could it really be THIS EASY to end your feelings of anger, sadness, aloneness, and overwhelm?”
“Could it really be possible that doing so will help increase my happiness in all areas of my life”?
And the answer is “Without a doubt!” I got over my postpartum depression and became a VERY happy mum who enjoys her kids.
I’ll show you the exact steps I used to end my postpartum depression and start living the happy, peaceful, comfortable life I’ve always wanted.
Because of my discovery… you don’t have to search for answers any longer.

 

You too Can Finally Have the Happy Life You Want

I’ll show you how to eliminate the negative energy that’s causing you to feel this way.
And as a result, you’re going to feel so much better about your life.
You’re going to become a much better Mum, parent, and role-model because of it.
I’m going to lay out the exact steps you need to follow… so you no longer have to wonder if you’re doing all the right things.
Better yet, you can learn ALL of it in just a few minutes… so you can start feeling more like yourself a lot sooner.

End Your Constant Sadness

& Be the Happy Mum You Want To Be

You won’t have the sadness, confusion, anger, and disappointment that MOST women deal with when they’re unaware of how to end their suffering.
Look, I know that you may not see a silver lining in your life right now.
I GET that. Again, I’ve been there.
It’s hard for you to feel enthusiastic or happy… because your own doubts and worries about your life are getting in the way of living the life you KNOW you were meant to live?
But I also want to let you know that…

It’s Not Too Late To Get A Brand New Lease on Life

Let me ask… have you ever wanted to get a “fresh start” in your life… where you finally had the happiness you really wanted?
It’s an incredible feeling when you can leave your worries behind you… and start out with a brand new feeling of peace.
It truly felt like a “fresh start” when I was able to get myself out of my daily “funk” and start being the mum I knew my kids deserved (and the wife I knew my husband deserved).
Feeling better and feeling happier will bring exciting changes and improvements in ALL areas of your life.

The Magic Moment When Your Life Changes For the Better…

 

I want you to experience that feeling when you truly feel happy with your life… when you truly have the happiness, comfort, peace of mind, and feelings of well-being you want.
Something magical will happen for you when you get over your postpartum depression because you’ll suddenly start to see things more clearly and you’ll start to feel like you’re “living” again.
Imagine what it will feel like to get out of bed in the morning feeling excited about the day ahead, feeling motivated and confident in your ability to handle whatever challenges come your way.
I want you to experience your magic moment… and I want you to realize that you can have ALL of this in just a short time from now.

Start Living Your Life To The Fullest Again…

Here’s what you’ll notice after using the Postpartum Depression Recovery Program:

• RELIEF as you discover that what’s happening to you can be changed quickly and easily.
• An UNDERSTANDING of why you got PPD in the first place (in fact it will make perfect sense to you after completing the first week’s lesson!)
• A clear and effective way to STOP anger, guilt, self-criticism and feeling like a failure
• You’ll get your SELF-WORTH back and you’ll learn how to feel good about yourself again.
• MOTIVATION and interest in setting goals and getting back into life again
• EMPOWERED to take on motherhood and the challenges of your life.
• The ability to be a HAPPIER, MORE CONFIDENT MUM.

Remember, I’ve been where you are and I know exactly how you feel.
And I’m PROOF that things can change for the best.
I designed this program to help you get rid of the anger, overwhelm, sadness, and feelings of being alone!

Here’s How This 12-Week Depression Recovery Program Works…

Each week… you’ll be sent a link via email with access to the week’s lesson that takes you by the hand and shows you step-by-step how to work your way out of your depression
Every day you’ll receive an email telling you what each day’s lesson is about with a link to log in.
On the 7th day of each week, you’ll be given an exercise to do so that you can USE in your daily life exactly what you’ve learned.
You’ll also have access to a member’s only Question and Answer (Q&A) Forum where you can ask questions about the material and how it relates to your specific situation.
If you have a particularly sensitive topic and you don’t wish to have it up on the Member’s Forum, you can email your question direct to me and I’ll help you in person.

I’m Right There, By Your Side, Each Step of the Way…

You’ll always be answered within 24 hours of posting your question.
Not only will you have your questions answered through the Member’s forum, you’ll also be able to see the answers of other questions posted by other members.
That way, you get to see different ways this information can be applied to different circumstances, giving you an even deeper understanding of the 5 steps taught in this program.
If you email the question, it will not be seen on the forum, so your privacy is maintained.

 

So How Much Does This Program Cost?

Well, let me ask… what price can you put on feeling better about yourself?
What’s your happiness worth?
Because the truth is, it’s not about how much this going to cost you… it’s about how you’re going to feel when you finally stop feeling sad, alone, and overwhelmed.
The fact is, you can’t put a price on your child being able to have a happy mother!
You’d spend thousands of dollars going to see a doctor. In fact, if you do feel you’re suicidal or in a deep, deep depression, I suggest you get medical help right away.
But without a doubt, just like the thousands of other mums I’ve helped with depression, you too can be happy, healthy and more confident in yourself and in your parenting abilities.
And since I can offer this system to you as an online, downloadable system… there are no printing or shipping costs. That way, I can pass along the savings to you.
If you join today, the Postpartum Recovery Program is now only 
$79.00
 $19.95 a week!
I can honestly say that there’s NEVER been a resource for mums that gives you the support, guidance, and knowledge you need for such an unbelievably affordable price.

For the Cost of a Cup of Coffee a day, you can Feel Happy Again

But just one small word of warning; this program is only $19.95 per week for a limited time. Once we fill up the class with a number I can comfortably teach, I’ll stop accepting enrollment.
So if you want to finally get out of that dark place that’s holding you back from living your life to the fullest, you’ll want to act right now.
What’s more… you are NOT locked into the full 12 weeks; you can stop at any time.
Not only that… I know you’re a busy, exhausted, overworked and time-strapped mum.

 

So This Program Was Designed Specifically For Busy Mums!

1. Most lessons are available in Audio – You can download the audio lessons right through your iphone, ipad or PC. That way, you can listen to the lessons while doing your housework. (Note: a great way to fit the daily reading in while your little one sleeps.)
2. Some lessons are taught via video – Lessons sometimes contain videos to show you a visual explanation of the method.
3. It’s time friendly – Knowing how mums are often short on time, your readings only take about 15 minutes each day. And just one hour is all that’s needed for your end of week exercise. Breaking it down this way helps you fit it in with the demands of your day.
4. You only have to remember five steps – The best part of this program is that you’ll be learning a simple, easy 5-step process that will help you to handle every challenge that you come across both in parenting and in life and you will be shown many different ways that this simple process can be applied.
Order Now and Receive These 3 Gifts, Worth at Least $98, FREE!

Free Bonus #1: The Happy Mum Handbook ($29.95 value)

Order now and you’ll get a PDF copy of the internationally top-selling ebook – The Happy Mum Handbook. This is 300 pages of original information containing the full method used by the Anti-depression Association of Australia who have helped over 4,000 people to overcome stress, depression and anxiety with very high success rates.
Free Bonus #2: YOU Inside the Mum PDF Manual ($29.95 value)
You’ll also receive a free PDF copy of the ‘YOU Inside the Mum’ Manual which gives you more ways to change how you feel. Topics such as loss of identity, relationships, anger, guilt, time management, how to be passionate about life, and lots of tips to deal with everyday little problems that we incur as mums.
Free Bonus #3: Discounts on Future Membership ($29.95 value)
After you complete the initial 12 week program, you’ll have the opportunity to sign up for our ongoing membership site for a discount. You’ll receive ongoing support and full access to all of the week’s lessons, so as you continue your recovery, you always have someone to lean on.

 

To Recap, Here’s Everything You Get:

• Access to your weekly e-classes via the member’s site.
• Access to your weekly e-classes via audio.
• Daily motivational emails to keep you inspired.
• Access to the 300-page PDF of The “YOU Inside the Mum” Manual (retailing at $29.95).
• A PDF copy of The Happy Mum Handbook (retailing at $29.95) absolutely FREE.
• Access to our members-only forum for any question you have.
• Email support for those sensitive questions that you don’t want displayed on the forum

You Get ALL of This for Just $19.95 a week!

I can assure you… $19.95 is a very small amount to invest in a stress-free, happier life!
That’s basically what it costs for a quality large pizza. And I’m sure a large pizza isn’t going to show you how to permanently feel happy and better about your life.
I just know this 12 week program is going to help ease your pains and frustrations… and solve your problems that you’re facing as a new mum who has suddenly found herself overwhelmed.
I know this stuff works because I’ve gotten a ton of Success Stories from other women who have used it to get through their depression a lot faster and easier… and become happy.
In fact, here are 2 recent success stories I received from mums who have used my advice…

Testimonial 1: “I have never really read anything like this. It made me realize how much judgement I have in my life. And that my mood is determined by my ‘get my life right’ model. It’s nice to accept myself and know I have implicit value despite my output.” Lisa – Glen Iris, Victoria

Testimonial 2: “I am really enjoying the program so far… I’ve just completed week 4 and it’s given me so much hope that I can finally take responsibility for my thoughts and get better. Counselling seemed like dragging up issues, and medication felt like masking the pain. Finally something practical that I can use. I love how it is broken down into manageable sections and literally takes 5 minutes a day. Zac sat next to me and played happily with his cars while I completed the lesson – that’s how easy it is to find the time. Kara – Ballarat, Victoria

Knowing I’ve developed a method that helps others is the most fulfilling thing I’ve ever done.

Here’s Your No-Risk, 100% Money Back Guarantee!

You know… I’m very confident this postpartum depression recovery program will give you everything you need so you can start feeling happy and like yourself again.
I’ve already tested and proven it with my own success. And it has also worked for each and every Mum who has seriously followed along in the program.
But even so, I want to eliminate all worry for you by letting you use this program at my expense!
I want you to do what’s BEST for you, right now. In other words… go ahead and order this program right now and take a full 8 weeks to try it out.
If you don’t feel like you’re happier, like you have more feelings of well-being and peace of mind, if you don’t feel like your life has changed for the best… just let me know and I’ll refund 100% of your purchase price. Absolutely no questions asked. Period.
That’s more than a guarantee, that’s a personal promise.
And since you took the time to try it, you can keep the PDF bonus gifts… free of charge… even if you decide to take advantage of the money-back guarantee.

It’s Your Turn To Shine…
To Do Something For YOU

So you have a very important choice to make here.
You can keep WISHING you had the happiness and the life you want. But as you already know…postpartum depression won’t just go away UNLESS you do something to change it.

I Don’t Want You to Feel Like This Forever

Or… you can take action and do this for your family, your kids, and more importantly…for YOU!
In just a few short weeks… you can have the happiness you never thought possible. And when you’re happy and confident with yourself… you just feel a WHOLE lot better.
And you know something… you deserve this. As a new mum… you want to feel good about your life, your kids, and your family, right?
So go ahead and take the next step. It really will be a life-changing experience… I promise!
Use my experience as a shortcut guide that can lead you to a new outlook…a newfound happiness… straight to a brand new you!
Here’s what to do now: Click the “register now” button below and order through paypal (you don’t have to have an account) and you’ll be downloading the log in information in just a minute!

 

Sincerely,
Jackie Hall
P.S. Sadly, so many Mums will go about their lives without experiencing the happiness and peace of mind they deserve. They’re too busy giving to others… and not to themselves.
I don’t want you to be one of them. It’s important you feel GOOD – it’s important you’re happy!
Just think of how you’ll feel when you’re finally free from the feelings of sadness, despair, and emptiness and how your life will be when you feel like you’re FINALLY the Mum you know you can be.
You’ll feel more like yourself… like you’ve finally gotten your life back. You’ll be happy and free.
P.P.S. And remember, there’s absolutely no risk for trying this out. If it’s not for you, you can get your money back quickly and easily. So don’t you owe it to yourself to at least try it?
Don’t delay. Order now and you can be receiving this program in less than a minute.

Remembering Tiffany

Today's post has nothing whatsoever to do with PstPartum Depression, pregnancy, mental health, or anything of the type. Today, I am remembering an extraordinary person who touched countless lives. She was one of my best friends. She was brave, kind, sweet, smart, and beautiful. Her name was Tiffany Leigh Hall and she died of brain cancer when she was 9 years old.

When I was 7, my dad moved to Austin, TX with his job while my mom, my brother and I stayed behind in Atlanta to sell our house. When he moved, he found a new church home at a non-denominational place called Round Rock Chapel. The members were welcoming and the Pastor (Dennis Hall) and his family (wife Vicki and kids Shawn, Aimee, Jason, Aaron, and Tiffany) adopted him quickly.

1 1/2 years later, our house still hadn't sold but my mom had had enough of being away from Dad so we moved out to Austin to join him. To say that I was unhappy to move away from my family and friends would be an extreme understatement. However, the Hall kids (among others) quickly pulled me in and we became friends. If I'm totally honest, I have to admit that I don't really remember hanging out with Shawn that much, probably because he was a few years older. Aimee and I hung out sometimes, and I remember one time she did friendship braids with beads in my hair. Jason, Aaron, and Tiffany were the ones I hung out with the most. When their parents went out of the country, they would come stay with us and vice versa.

Tiffany loved people, loved animals, and loved God. She had a faith that would put that of many adults to shame. When doctors discovered in March 1996 that she had a malignant and particularly nasty brain tumor, her faith never wavered. From the program at her memorial service:

"Tiffany means,the presence and appearance of God,and she came into the family of Dennis and Vicki Hall at a time when they needed God's presence.Wounded from a painful experience in a church and unemployed,it seemed that another mouth to feed would only add to their burden,especially when she was born with a birth defect.Instead,she became to the whole family the joy,hope and optimism that was truly the presence and appearance of God in their lives,"...In Thy presence is fullness of joy..."(Psalm 16:11) 

Yet from the day of her birth on August 20,1987,Tiffy was a fighter.God miraculously worked and she overcame the difficulties of a cleft palate.She sculpted her place in the family as the giggling,laughing center of attention. Somehow,in spite of being the youngest of three brothers and one sister,she had a way of taking charge and making things happen.In fact,her siblings laughingly called her "the Boss".She loved to dance,swim,play and "mother" any child or creature she deemed needing it.Something about her seemed to draw the neighborhood children around the Hall house day and night.She never met a person she didn't see as a potential friend and playmate,young or adult. 

Having heard of Jesus from the time she was born,it is not surprising that she asked Jesus into her heart at the age of six.She was baptized in the San Gabriel River and loved her church.That love was returned by Round Rock Chapel and the churches in Austin and from all over the United States,when it was discovered in March of 1996 that she had a devastating tumor.They prayed,called, sent money and supported her in a fight that lasted eight months beyond the predictions of the doctors.She was a fighter who "fought the good fight of faith"never wanning in her spirit,cheerfulness or courage.Her spirit captured the hearts of all who fought with her.On Saturday morning,February 15,1997, Tiffany went to be with Jesus.Though we will miss her,our lives will forever be changed by her."

It's been 15 years and I still remember that morning clearly. It was a Saturday. My brother, Aaron Hall, and I were in a basketball league called Little Dribblers (out of a church that was then Hilltop Baptist) together, although we were on different teams. The teams met for practice and games once a week on Saturday mornings. Valentine's Day had been the day before and that Saturday morning didn't seem any different. Josiah and I were on a team together and our family had watched Aaron's team play and then we ourselves had played. I don't remember who won, but I do remember that my family went out for ice cream afterwards (we usually did after a game).

As we walked in the door to our house, the phone rang. I answered it and it was Aaron. He was upset and wanted to talk to my parents, he said "Tiffany's gone". I got my parents the phone and crouched against the wall in the hall outside their bedroom waiting for them to get off the phone, hoping against hope that I had misunderstood what Aaron was saying.

I hadn't. It was the worst morning of my life thus far.

I don't remember everything that happened the rest of the day. I do remember going to our next door neighbor's house to tell Miss Tilly that she was gone and riding my bicycle down to the "Goat Ranch" to tell our friend who took care of the goats (and a donkey and a horse and at various other times, varying numbers of different types of critters) the news.

I didn't go to her funeral. I thought that if I went I would have to go to the cemetery and see her casket be lowered into the ground and buried. I couldn't handle seeing dirt piled on my friend's casket. I was only 12. I went instead to another friend's house and stayed there while my parents were at the funeral. I wish I had told them my worries so that they could have told me otherwise and I would have gone, it took me a really long time to find closure.

I was so confused for a long time. I didn't understand why God would take Tiffy. Why would he take someone so young with so much passion for life, who had so many things she wanted to do in His service? I had believed so fully that she would be healed that I had been making plans for a party that I would throw when it was finally announced that she was in remission. I still don't understand why He allowed it to happen but I have come to the conclusion that God is God and some things I will never understand.

There have been many times when it's been difficult to have faith, hard to trust that God knows what He's doing and that He won't let me go. Tiffany was a wonderful example, though, of how to have the childlike faith that the Bible extols.

Today, when I remember Tiffy, I'm sad. I'm sad that she isn't here to see the wonderful people her siblings have married and to be excited and dote on her nieces and nephews. I'm sad that I couldn't giggle with her over the man I married. I'm sad that her parents had to bury their baby when she was only 9 years old. But today, I also smile as I remember her vivacity, spunk, and energy. I take delight in remembering singing and dancing around with her, I laugh as I remember having a mud fight and fashion show with her, Aaron, Jason, and Josiah when they stayed at my house while their parents were gone. I hold fond memories of discussing earnestly what the baby goats down the road should be named. I remember her making up a song "My brother Jason. I love my brother Jason." at her house. I'm sure he knows it but she absolutely adored him. She loved her entire family.

Today I'm sad because she's not here with me to tag on Facebook or text about how my oldest daughter not only took off her diaper but ran around swinging it like a lasso over her head in her bedroom. However, I also take comfort in the precious memories I have of the time I was able to spend with her and the knowledge that I'll see her again someday. I take inspiration from her. She made such a huge difference in so many peoples lives at such a young age and had such faith and love.

Today, I remember Tiffany. To the Hall family, my thoughts and prayers are with you on this day. I love you all and you hold a dear place in my heart. Thank you for sharing such a wonderful person with all the rest of us.

Expecting the Unexpected

*Disclaimer* I am not bashing anyone. I am not accusing anyone of anything. This is not meant to be taken personally by anybody. *end disclaimer*

I think someday I'll write a book. I'll title it "Expecting the Unexpected". A New York Times Bestseller List review might start with something like "In this masterful blend of humorous recollections and serious thoughts, Esther Dale addresses her viewpoint of what it's like to face an unexpected pregnancy... as a married woman."

I'm now in my third pregnancy. Number one was unexpected before I was married. Number two was a TTC (Trying To Conceive) baby. The only surprise with her was how fast the pregnancy happened once I went off of Birth Control. Number three is, once again, unexpected, a pill baby.

I'll be honest. I've been on a whole roller coaster of emotions with this one. At first it was shock. Like, honest to goodness "No way is this real, am I actually pregnant" type shock. This past week when I finally got to see the bebe on ultrasound and get a due date (September 5, 2012), reality finally started to set in some and I've started to transition from "Um... I"m not really pregnant..." to "Um... I'm actually pregnant.".

Seeing what is unmistakably a baby with a definite heartbeat, arms, legs, a head, a body, a midline of a brain, and wiggling and jumping all over the place (knowing that this view is coming from having a camera wand shoved up the same place the baby will eventually emerge from) made it much more real.

"So, now that if feels real, you must be really happy and excited. I mean, it's a baby! And you're married! And you're a Christian of the Mormon variety so you view babies as blessings straight from God! You must be so excited, right?" Do you want the answer that I'm probably "supposed" to give? The "Supposed to" answer is "Oh yes, of course I'm terribly excited, tickled pink in fact!!!".

If that's not the answer you want to hear, stop reading right now.

The reality is that I'm not happy. I'm not excited. I will be eventually, but right now? No. In fact, I think I'm having a harder time adjusting to this unexpected pregnancy than I did the first. I would have thought it would be the other way around. As an unmarried pregnant girl, I expected to deal with a lot of stigma, judgment, and upturned noses. Since I got married before I was showing, the people who knew were people I knew and almost all of them were supportive of me. There was disappointment, sure, and I expected that. Christian girls aren't supposed to have sex (much less get pregnant) before they get married. But, pretty much everyone, regardless of disappointment, showered me with love and support. Their reactions spoke highly of the quality of their character that they didn't throw copies of The Scarlet Letter at me and demand my public flogging.

Last time, it didn't really derail any plans I had. I was working at a restaurant. When we got married, I only had to move 2 hours away so I knew I still had easy access to my family and friends, my support system. This time? I had plans. This time, I'm dealing with dreams that I thought were about to start coming true now being put off a while longer. Nursing school, Mrs. California-America, all sorts of things I had hoped to do this year that will now be changed or postponed because of two little pink lines. I had just come off the Zoloft and was feeling so much better. I had more energy, I was in a better mood, my sex drive made a return, I was excited about really starting to work out and lose weight. I was excited at my body finally being my own (with the exception of nursing but that's not a 24/7 thing and she's started to drink from sippy cups) and getting to be a normal person for a little while. Now, I share my body with a little person whose size will be likened to various types of fruit (apparently I am currently carrying a baby that is somewhere between a grape and a kumquat). The next 31 weeks will be about making sure that 2 of us are healthy. I can't just guzzle 5 Dr. Peppers if I'm exhausted (the irony being that I rarely feel the need for a Caffeine energy boost so much as during pregnancy).

I didn't want to get pregnant right now. I'm not happy about it yet. But most people expect me to be. Somehow, our society (or at least, the part of society to which I am privy) seems to have an expectation that if you are unexpectedly pregnant while married, you will miraculously skip all the conflicting emotions and disappointment about plans being thrown in the air and jump right to excitement and giddiness. When you add in being a Christian and the whole matter of "Babies are a BLESSING!"? Yeeeah. That makes it even harder to process your feelings. I personally have been told "But babies are a gift from God, you need to be thankful for this". Yes, they are. But you know, emotions are not quite that simple...

The guilt makes it even worse. I have friends who would LOVE to have a baby, but they have trouble getting pregnant or they get pregnant and then miscarry. So of course this nasty little voice in my head starts mumbling about how ungrateful I am and what a horrible person I am to be having feelings like this when there are people who would give anything to be dealing with an unexpected pregnancy.

Of course, behind it all are my worries about PPD. What if all this emotional turmoil is a pre-cursor to heavy medication and hospitalizations, to another bout with that not-so-dear companion? I wasn't ready to deal with having to prepare myself for the possibility of another round of PPMD.

None of these things make it easy to process (much less talk about) how I feel, and yet, aren't my feelings just as valid as anyone else's? Aren't my tears just as precious and my sadness at the things I have to put off, my disappointment at facing something I actively tried to prevent, real and legitimate? Why does society ask "Are you ok" when you're faced with a surprise outside of marriage but assume that you are if your "Wait, WHAT?" happens withing the bonds of matrimony? I've spoken with a few other women who have dealt with this same situation and I'm not the only one who picks up on this vibe, I'm not the only one who has trouble talking about her feelings on the topic and who feels guilty about it. And yet, we shouldn't feel any more guilty about our feelings than a woman who's going through PPD should (she shouldn't, by the way, lest anyone mistake what I'm saying).

Eventually, I'll be happy. With all the obstacles that stood in the way of us conceiving, God (or fate, the universe, whoever/whatever you believe in, however you want to refer to it/them) clearly intended for this baby to come along. There is a reason for this baby, it was meant to be and it was meant to be now. I accept that, and I am in awe of the fact that God determined me strong enough to travel this road, that He decided I am the right one to be it's mother. This is my baby and I will love it, care for it, do everything in my power to protect it from all manner of harm from now until the day I die. There is no question that this baby will be raised in a home full of love and caring, knowing that as with every human, it has value that goes beyond the here and now.

In the meantime though, don't begrudge me my emotions. Don't judge me for my feelings, I'm only human and doing the best I can with what I've got. Don't look at me, or any other woman who's in my shoes, and peer down your nose at us or say/think condescending platitudes. Let's work on changing society, changing the expectations, changing our reactions. I, and all those who stand with me, deserve to be able to have and express our feelings on this and receive love and support just as much as a woman who finds out she's pregnant and not married.